Monday, July 06, 2009

The 4th & Forgiveness

This weekend was great. I really had so much fun with The Conductor. We always have so much right. Well to use RG's term we hit a bump in the road. Not like a pebble more of a speed bump. I'm going to do this the vaguest way possible.

We were hanging out and he did something without warning me. Something that I'm only okay with if I'm told about it first. Something i said i didn't want him to do that day. Well this something pissed me the F off. I was so mad. And when i get mad like this i need to be alone. I deal with my emotions differently than some. I was so mad i kept telling him to leave and that i needed to be alone. I was being a real bitch cause well that's what i do when I'm pissed off.

This was the deal breaker. He didn't leave. No matter how mean and rude and what messed up comments i made to him, he stayed. So it took me like at least an hour to calm down. He stayed by my side and tried his best to explain to me what he did and how he felt really bad about it. And that it would never happen again. And he came up with a solution for us and i forgave him.

He told me that with me hes the happiest he has ever been. Now I'm really skeptical about stuff like this and guys saying these sorts of things but i believe him and honestly i feel the same way about him. he makes me really happy and i know what he did wasn't really on purpose. now i don't know/think this will last forever. Its almost too good to be true but in the mean time i want to hold on to this good feeling. i want to spend as much time with him as possible and it seems like he does too.

So i felt the need to just kinda get the drama off my chest and let it go completely. I feel like i can do that now.

1 comment:

  1. Read the book I sent you!! Haha!! But for real, to me it seems like these bumps, blocks whatever we need to call them are sort of like tests that are sprung out of nowhere to test the strength of the relationship. I believe that if you are both able to look at each other without an awkwardness at the end of that "bump", then things will be ok. Does this make sense? Anyway, if it feels right, stick with it no matter the consequences b/c remember "It is better to have lost at love, than never to have loved at all". Enjoy the beauty of love while you have it. Not everyone is lucky enough to experience such a great thing :)