Thursday, May 21, 2009

Reading Makes You Think

So i was reading Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants and Lena said something that I've been thinking about for some time now. She said there are people who fall in love lots of times and then there are some people who only fall in love once.

I started thinking about this because well it seems like I've only been in relationships. Like long term. I had a high school boyfriend we were together for 5 years. at the time i thought i was super deep in love with him but by the end of senior year i realized that i wanted to be single. And looking back now i don't think i was ever really in love with him like seriously. I grew to love him but not be in love with him.

And then well there is Mike. Ive slowly fallen out of love with him but ill always love him too. Looking back on that relationship i know it was real. So i joke around a lot about being in love. I'm always saying i just fell in love with the latest hot guy (Right now Spock aka Zachary Quinto). Of course you all know i love Manu.

So now I'm wondering will i fall in love again? Do i even want to fall in love again? I'm at a part of my life where i love being single maybe cause I've really only gone out with 2 guys. Sure i had a couple of "things" in between but i spent 5 years with one & 3 1/2 years with the other. So in total I've spent almost 9 years in a relationship. I love being single, i remember Rita, Rose and i had this conversation once & they seemed to agree about enjoying single life.

But what if Lena was right what if you only fall in love once. What happens when you meet someone new. I want to be able to fall in love like 10 times. I don't want to think you just fall in love once. But I've asked this question, love or happiness of course i choose happiness. Love to me is a foreign concept only because the examples of love i have seen don't make me believe in it. I don't believe in being hurt over someone you love. I don't allow myself to hurt. Well i do my best.

Just some, as Rattlergrl would say, "Random Thoughts"!

2 comments:

  1. Oh I like these kinds of posts. I say enjoy your life all you can b4 really settling into love. I think that especially nowadays, a girl needs to have fun and experience life and all it has to offer. If you find your "true love" along the way great, but I don't think it is something that should be rushed.
    Personally, I myself have been in two serious relationships and of those two, I can honestly say that love was present in one. But throughout that time, I always remembered to have fun and to be a girl.

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  2. Dammit! I had this huge thing typed out and when I pressed enter on this stoopid wireless keyboard I lost the whole thing! I guess I'll have to try again! lol
    I remembered we discussed this! I do love being single. One reason is because I like the fact that I don't have anyone holding me back..I know I shouldn't think that about someone I care about but it's true. If I get a job offer on the moon I want to be able to say that I'll take it on the spot and not say that I have to go discuss it with someone..
    I think people can fall in live more than once but only because I'm a romantic at heart that believes there should be strong chemistry between two people before they even discuss anything further. I think I watch too many black and white movies!
    I agree with you about the not getting hurt. I try to avoid it and I don't allow it. I had a total breakthrough the first time I typed this..maybe I enjoy being single because I don't want to hurt and this way no one does hurt me but sometimes still want to be with the person I call my soulmate because I am in love? I don't know! lol

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